We're married!

I vow to love and cherish you with deep gratitude. I will communicate love and adoration in ways that resonate with you, perform thoughtful gestures, and do all I can to help you feel adored. I vow to put "we" before "me" by prioritizing our relationship over my individual desires when it truly matters. I vow to honor and respect our differences, and embrace the things that you prioritize even when they differ from my own. I vow to be your spiritual home, a place where you can be vulnerable, open, and fully yourself. I vow to create a safe space for honesty and accountability, to call you out with compassion and encouragement, and to be honest with you when I am personally struggling, even if the struggle involves our relationship. I vow to seek guidance from trusted individuals to see my part in our conflicts and seasons of struggle, and to work on growing and changing where needed. I vow to be emotionally available, patient, and understanding, to recognize that our different experiences shape us and that growth takes time. I vow to work towards forgiving you when you show up as a hurt and wounded version of yourself, and to recognize that we all have moments of struggle. I vow to dedicate myself to understanding both your and my past pains, present needs, and future longings. I vow to respect and nurture your individual identity, and encourage you to grow and thrive as a unique individual within our partnership. I vow to grow, learn, and adapt with you, to embrace new experiences and life’s changes as opportunities to strengthen our bond and enrich our lives together. I vow to help you find and excel at your ikigai, and maintain balance in life. I vow to actively listen to you with empathy and compassion, to help you feel understood, validated, and supported in moments of sadness, fear, or vulnerability. I vow to be a partner in managing the logistics of our life, to share decisions, responsibilities, and tasks in ways that honor both our strengths and needs. I vow to make intentional choices that align with our shared values, even when others may disagree. I vow to embrace joy and playfulness, to celebrate the small moments that bring us laughter, and to find happiness in your happiness. I vow to nurture passion and intimacy in our relationship, and to cherish the physical connection we share by making space for moments of love and closeness. I vow to support your important relationships, and the boundaries we have established to protect our relationship. I vow to treat your family as my own, embracing their traditions and welcoming them into my heart. I vow to be an active and loving co-parent to our dogs, always looking after their happiness and well-being. I vow to engage in and maintain an intentional community of friends and family, and participate in experiences that support our social well-being. I vow to co-create our dream future together that not only fulfills our deepest aspirations but also leaves a meaningful legacy and contributes positively to the world around us.

The Yiddish word Beshert translates to "destiny." In Jewish culture, Beshert means soulmate. Other meanings include: "inevitable," "a fortuitous event," and "a marriage match." The essence of Beshert shines brightly in Harry and Steph's love, and in their love story. Harry found Steph on a dating app called Hinge. He messaged her with the epic opening line of "I love everything about your profile." Sure that he used that line on every woman, Steph challenged him to explain what, exactly, he liked about it. He responded in detail with what he liked about every prompt and every picture. Convinced he was sincere, Steph agreed to go on a date. Steph and Harry met in the Marina neighborhood of San Francisco for their first date. The normal "get-to-know-you" chitchat revealed that Harry hailed from Pittsburgh, PA, the city where Steph's mom grew up and where many of her family members still reside. Harry quickly shot off a text message to his folks, asking if they knew Steph's family's name. At that point, both put their phones away to focus on the date, which consisted of questionable quality amateur comedy (and food), followed by hours of connected conversation. When Steph got home from the date that night, she received a text from Harry: "Call me immediately." Curious, she called. "Does the name Edie Twersky mean anything to you?" Harry asked, skipping right to the point. Edie Twersky was Steph's great aunt (on her mother's side). "Oh shit. Are we related?!" Steph blurted out. "Not exactly..." "That's not comforting!" "Do you remember the man she dated for the last decade of her life?" Harry asked. "Of course!" Steph replied. "Ed!" "Ed was my grandfather," Harry shared. Long story short, Steph's great-aunt Edie and Harry's grandfather Ed, had been friends for most of their adult lives and began dating in their 80's after both had been widowed. They dated for nearly a decade, and for the rest of their lives. They became fixtures in the lives of each of their families, with Steph meeting Ed and Harry meeting Edie without ever crossing paths themselves. Whether you believe this to be one of life's weird coincidences, or a beautiful orchestration of fate, it's undeniable that the odds of Steph and Harry meeting randomly on a dating app while living on the opposite side of the country from where their families' stories connected are astronomical. Maybe Hinge's algorithm got lucky. Maybe Edie and Ed pulled some strings. Either way, the rest, as they say, is history.