One random compliment about Dee’s glasses and the next thing you know we are chatting away via an online app! We agreed it was quite a refreshing change to meet each other on chance versus referral and even better that neither one of us knew any of the other’s friends or co-workers. The conversations were so easy and consisted of never-ending topics from previous relationships education & goals to family and silly fears like roller coasters and spiders lol. Though we “weren’t looking for a relationship,” and just wanted to “meet new friends,” we decided to meet for drinks at the Campbell Brewery one chilly November 25th and we just really hit it off! It wasn’t a “date” per se, but we later realized how many things we had in common such as our love of basketball, football, and 90’s R&B/Hip Hop music. AND in spite of one being mature, organized and introverted, and the other being an extroverted and a spontaneous seventeen-year-old at heart, we didn’t stop smiling or laughing for what seemed to be hours. Afterward, we continued our “non-date” having dinner at Little Lou’s BBQ and well...the rest is history. That “non-date” on the 25th has been our “date” of monthly celebration for the last 2 1/2 years!

Just imagine the scene when Aladdin describes to the Genie Princess Jasmine’s smile, eyes, and hair...You can almost see the hearts floating in the air. Brandy’s friends knew it was much more than even SHE expected as they saw an unfamiliar spark in her eyes while she talked about the “new friend she’s been hanging around.” One night in Roseville, Brandy struggled with telling Dee her feelings. She had just ended a marriage, had kids and was on her own for the first time in years, loving life. Dee was younger, no kids or previous marriage and was living a carefree life as well. Knowing the risk, she was able to come clean about falling for Dee. She even explained how her heart does “flip flops” when she sees her, which Dee thought was cute. BUT knowing this wasn’t supposed to happen because it wasn’t part of the “plan,” she knew she risked Dee not feeling the same. She confessed and it was indeed early for Dee. But Brandy knew something was there, and that it was unfamiliar territory. Until Dee, she considered herself incapable of having these feelings for anyone. It was scary, magical, exciting and painful all at once. She’d just have to wait and see. DEE: “Really? Now? Could it really be possible that the first person I meet after my last breakup is THE one?” Dee always asked herself this question. She took it slow, checked all the boxes along the way, trying somehow to disprove her feelings. Having been let down before, she was jaded and afraid and that’s why she wouldn’t say the four-letter-word out loud. But six months later, Dee found the courage and broke her silence. She could no longer hide the way she felt or pretend it didn’t exist. Life’s too short not to take chances. It's the real deal for the both of us, finally. We keep saying that it gets better every single day. You can plan all you like, but you can't help who your heart falls in love with. Who knows what the “real plan” is anyway. And timing?...At our ages, let's just say, it's about time!

Our little non-traditional family unit: Three kids and two Moms. Yes, Dee had to have SERIOUSLY considered what she was getting into as she confessed her love for me. I worried enough for the both of us what this would mean for her in terms of her new responsibilities. Taking on two teenage daughters and an eight-year-old son would be quite a change and a real test of our love...mainly because I knew just how life was like in “Brandyland” before her: carpool, homework, hours spent running around from city to city and from sport to sport, not to mention birthday parties, doctor’s appointments, the list goes on and on. Many late night talks were devoted to all my worries and Dee put them to rest each time. In addition, I also worried about the kids and if they could get used to seeing their mom in love with another woman, much less begin to accept her as another parental figure. To my delight, the transitioning was nearly seamless. Dee became one of us instantly as the kids took to her with open arms. Dee jumped right in and planned dinners, game & movie nights, and weekend family trips. The teenagers started to go to her for advice and Dee would soon join me as a driving instructor and a college advisor! Pictures would be drawn and stories would soon be written about “Mom and Dee” both at the grade school and middle school. Then we began receiving hugs as the “Moms.” We are so proud of them all and they seem to be proud of us. We are already being asked when we are giving them more siblings...gotta love them. We couldn’t have asked for a better union and the feeling is mutual across the board. We are very lucky.

BRANDY’S PROPOSAL Attempt #1 - New York, New Year’s Eve. (A bucket list item) Cancellation Reason? Dee mentioned in a casual conversation that getting engaged on a holiday isn’t very personal or special. (Strike 1) Attempt #2 - Disneyland, St. Patrick’s Day weekend. Cancellation Reason? Dee told her sister one day it would horrify her to get engaged in front of a lot of people. Her sister coincidently WAS going to join us at Disney to capture it on film saying she was coming along for her birthday weekend. (Strike 2) Attempt #3 - Little Lou’s BBQ after a Shark’s game with family set to surprise her at the restaurant. Cancellation Reason? Didn’t go to the hockey game or dinner. Dee wanted to go out dancing with her siblings instead. (Strike 3) THE ACTUAL PRPOSAL: The NEXT day with the help of Dee’s siblings & her Roseville family, along with our friends and the kiddos, we pulled off one heck of a surprise on a Sunday morning. (Ask Dee sometime why this was NOT an easy task.) Song lyrics are poetry and have meaning if you take the time to listen. I have seven songs on my playlist that ALWAYS remind me of an important time or milestone in our relationship. I decided to make her a craft. I took these seven symbolic songs, lyrics and dates and made hand-decorated wooden plaques with a laminated photo representing the time and place of the memory. I played the song and showed her the first five downstairs after she came home from brunch with her sister. We’d reminisce and hug and cry a bit. She thought it was so thoughtful, and probably thought I was about to propose but then I just stopped. I told her I’d cleaned and did some redecorating upstairs while she was gone and hoped she liked the changes. Deflated, she walked upstairs where I surprised her with hundreds of twinkle lights, rose petals, and the final two plaques. We were both in tears knowing this was IT. I got down on my knee and asked. This is the short version, but you can see photos on the next page...

DEE’S PROPOSAL I just so happened to mention one night as we were getting ready to go out with friends, “I’m so glad you have that ring on your finger.” I was insinuating of course that she looked amazing and that she might have a few people looking her way, but that the ring would inform them she was “taken.” Her comment back to me was actually quite unexpected. I assumed she’d say something sweet and appreciative like always but instead she came back with, “Yeah, not too happy that YOU don’t look engaged.” Because, after all, I am the one who told Dee one day that I didn’t need an engagement ring for two reasons: 1.) It tears latex gloves and gets in the way of my job. 2.) It would be too expensive to purchase two engagement rings. She then started giving me all of the reasons why I should have a ring on my finger and asked me questions on what I’d be willing to wear. It would come up in conversation once in a while but after a few months I assumed it was a dead issue...until the day of our engagement photo shoot at Shoreline Park. Not realizing all that Dee had arranged for us prior to arriving at the photo session, I stood alone posing for the photographer with Dee behind me about five feet in the background. He took several shots telling me to pose this way and that way, then eventually he said, “Ok now turn your head over your shoulder and look toward Dee.” And there she was: down on one knee holding an open box with the most awesome engagement ring just for me! It was a very big deal that Dee would propose, let alone in a public place and so I did not take that lightly as I knelt down beside her to hug her and accept her beautiful proposal, which of course was captured by our photographer. Dee said she was so unbelievably nervous (as if I’d say no) lol. But I think she gained courage that day that she never knew she had. Love this woman who continues to amaze me on a regular basis.