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January 14, 2024
Sheepshead Bay, NY

Sarah & Yosef

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    Frequently Asked Questions

Frequently Asked Questions

On this page are general FAQs and information about our traditional Jewish wedding
Question

By when should I RSVP?

Answer

Please RSVP no later than December 30, 2023.

Question

Is there a dress code?

Answer

Please wear your favorite cocktail attire. Typically, a suit and tie or a dress. Please keep in mind that our chuppah (ceremony) will be in the main sanctuary at the Sephardic Lebanese Congregation. You may feel more comfortable with a coverup on hand for the ceremony. We will provide kippot/yarmulkes for anyone who would like to wear one.

Question

What time should I arrive?

Answer

We recommend arriving no later than 4:15pm so that you don't miss the bedeken (ritual bridal veiling)! If you don't want to miss some of the cocktails, schmoozing, and food that we'll have at kabbalat panim (receiving guests) and the tisch, please arrive by 4pm. Because of the nature of the chuppah (ceremony), if you arrive later than 4:30pm, we may not be able to seat you in the sanctuary until 4:45pm or later.

Question

Are kids welcome?

Answer

Yes, we'd love to celebrate with you and your kids! If they were not included in your invitation or RSVP, please let us know.

Question

Can I bring a plus-one?

Answer

We will not be able to host additional guests or plus-ones. Thank you for understanding.

Question

Do you have any hotel recommendations?

Answer

We have organized a small block of rooms at the Arthouse Hotel in Manhattan. More information about hotels is available on our Accommodations and Travel page. Our wedding venue is a 45-60 minute subway ride from most of Manhattan, 35-45 minutes from most of Brooklyn.

Question

Is there parking?

Answer

There is some street parking in the immediate vicinity, and garages and parking lots in the area. We will share a Lyft code on our Accommodations and Travel page no later than one month before our wedding. You can use the code and travel to and from our wedding on us.

Question

I have a food allergy or dietary restriction, can I make a special request?

Answer

Please let us know about food allergies or restrictions when you RSVP. We will only be serving *kosher* dairy and parve food and drinks. As such, there will be options suitable for pescatarians, vegetarians, and vegans.

Question

A traditional (Orthodox) Jewish wedding typically has the following components:

Answer

Kabbalat panim (Receiving guests) – our wedding will officially start with kabbalat panim, in which guests arrive and greet Sarah while enjoying cocktail hour Chattan’s tisch (Groom’s table) – at the same time as kabbalat panim, Yosef, joined by close family and friends and our m’sader kiddushin (officiant), will sign tenaim, engagement documents, and our ketubah, the Jewish wedding contract Bedeken (Veiling) – right before the chuppah, and accompanied by singing and fanfare, Yosef will cover Sarah’s face with the veil. This tradition commemorates (and aims to circumvent!) when Jacob married Leah in Rachel’s place, because Leah’s face was hidden under her veil (Genesis 29) Chuppah (Ceremony) – chuppah refers to the canopy under which the chattan and kallah are married. The chuppah symbolizes the Jewish home the couple will build together. During the chuppah, Yosef and Sarah (accompanied by their family) will process down the aisle, and when they meet each other under the chuppah, Sarah will walk seven circles around Yosef, and Yosef will walk the same around Sarah, symbolizing the new bonds they are creating together. This is followed by kiddushin (betrothal), during which blessings over the first cup of wine are said and the wine is drunk, Yosef gives Sarah a ring, and consecrates their commitment, and nissu’in (marriage), during which the Sheva B’rachot (seven blessings) are read. After the Sheva B’rachot are read, Yosef will smash a glass, a commemoration of as-yet rebuilt Temple in Jerusalem even in this moment of great joy. Yichud – immediately after the chuppah, Sarah and Yosef will have some private time together. The reception will start during this time. Birkat Hamazon (Grace after meals) – During the reception, we will repeat the Sheva B’rachot at the end of Birkat Hamazon (all the words will be in booklets on your table). Birkat Hamazon is not an invitation to leave! We’ll say Birkat Hamazon before dessert is served. (Adapted from myjewishlearning.com)

Question

Hebrew words and phrases that you may hear:

Answer

Kallah: bride Chattan: groom Chuppah: wedding canopy, also used to refer to the ceremony itself Ketubah: Jewish wedding contract, written in Aramaic; it attests to the marriage and that the groom will meet (at minimum) certain financial and relational commitments for the bride M’sader kiddushin: Literally translated as “kiddushin orderer”, the m’sader kiddushin is the officiant of our wedding and all its proceedings, and certifies that everything is done according to Jewish law. Usually, and as at our wedding, the m’sader kiddushin is a rabbi Eid: witness, as there are multiple aspects of a Jewish wedding that need certain approved witnesses to confirm were done (ketubah, kiddushin, and yichud) Kittel: a white garment the chattan usually wears over his suit, under the chuppa Sheva b’rachot: translates to “seven blessings.” These blessings are said under the chuppa by close family and friends, and repeated again during the reception at the conclusion of Birkat Hamazon (also called “bentching”), or Grace after Meals. Many couples continue their celebrations with “Sheva Brachot meals" for the week after their wedding, when the Sheva B’rachot can continue to be said for the chattan and kallah during Birkat Hamazon.

Question

Will men and women sit separately at the wedding?

Answer

Yes and no. During our chuppah, in the main sanctuary of the Sephardic Lebanese Congregation, men and women will sit separately. During our first dance (the hora), men and women will dance separately. We will not have a mechitza (divider) for dancing. We acknowledge that separation based on traditional conceptions of gender does not accommodate everyone's gender identity/expression. We hope that this does not cause any stress or tzuris, and we encourage and invite you to choose where you are comfortable. We hope you will still join us at our chuppah and on the dance floor.

Question

Anything else I need to know?

Answer

Not that we can think of! If you aren't already familiar with these traditional Jewish songs that we’ll be playing and singing, here's links to listen to them: Od Yishama: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NZieABNFVfE Hava Nagila: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jYCYa_eLhh0 Siman tov u'mazel tov: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3AHownn3dQ

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