Wedding Party
Kevin McKechney
Best Man
Kevin...aka John Snow, aka Jesus's twin brother, is Joe and Ali's third roommate. Kevin is possibly the funniest person on the planet, the first person you'd recruit to drink PBR, and the guy you call when you need a safe, listening ear. Since Joe & Ali legally adopted Kevin his life has become immeasurably better. They are proud parents and can't wait to see what kind of man Kevin becomes.
Steve Owens
Groomsman
Has an unhealthy obsession with Taco Bell and the laws of America. Once instituted a "no cheetos in bed" rule. Also known for getting lost in the middle of the night and accidentally breaking into Ali's parents room. He loves dinosaurs, has an infectious laugh and will take your call at any time to shoot the breeze.
Dakota Burke
Usher
Dakota...aka Dak...has been good friends with Joe since 2011 when he first joined the Chip Team. Some people call him the space cowboy, some people call him the gangster of love. But you should feel free to call him Dakota.
Michael Bateman
Usher
Michael...aka Bateman...was also part of the Chip team with Joe. Bateman is a fiercely loyal friend and has the best collection of funky blazers. He is best know for his long, luscious red hair and his incredible Fiancé, Peggy. Clear the dance floor when Bateman approaches...he brings the heat.
David Standerfer
Usher
AKA Ace Ventura convinced Ali that Joe wasn't a serial killer and is the biggest reason Ali and Joe are together today. One time, David tried to have a dance off with Ali and he ended up in the ER... let that be a lesson to all. David's pet alligator, Kevin, is with us today...somewhere.
Tyler Henderson
Groomsman
Tyler and Joe met in high school and have been close ever since. Tyler is known for his beautiful hair and blasting 'Sugar' by Maroon 5 on repeat in the middle of the desert at 3am.
Jerrold Ofiana
Groomsman
Jer/J/Jerry/Jer Bear/Mila's Funcle went to the same gym as Joe and Ali where they were all coached by Coach KT. Jerry became fast friends with Joe by smoking meats, slacking off in partner workouts and staying up until absurd hours in the morning to make good memories. Just wait till you see Jer tear up the dance floor...something him and joe do NOT have in common.
Jake Gigliotti
Groomsman
Jake is an avid outdoorsman. He's best known for spending too much time scouting rapids, prank calling comcast tech support and being a camera man for the famous TV show Cops. Today is also the first time Jake has worn a suit. 10-1 odds he ends up in shorts and Chacos by 6:45pm.
Jake Bergmann
Man of Honor
Jake has known Ali her entire life and they were roommates for almost 20 years. Jake showed Ali how to drive stick (poorly) and was instrumental in ticking up Ali's time in the penalty box by locker boxing in the basement after school. Jake always lit the way by leading with kindness. His superpower is making people feel like the most special person in the room. He also rubbed off some of his dance moves to Ali and blazed the 'Bergmann path' for Ali to follow.
Tayne Bergmann
Bridesmaid
Tayne and Ali met in college, where Ali quickly told Tayne to dump Jake because she was too good for him. Ali's plot failed and she couldn't be happier it did. Tayne is the most selfless, hardworking, self aware, thoughtful human around. She's also always down for crazy antics with Ali like smashing coconuts with their bare hands or learning WAP choreo in the living room.
Katie Kopolovic
Matron of Honor
Katie, aka "the beast" aka "coach", was manager/head coach at CrossFit Paradox where Ali coached with her for several years. Ali was intimidated by how good KT was at bar cycling and they became fast friends. She's the best consumer of doughnuts, has incredible calves, can talk stock trading and finance better than most, will work you over in a batting cage and rips shots of jager like nobody you know. Katie put up with long gym nights with Ali, saved her from a broken back, captured a bat with Ali and started the most allusive IL scooter gang. Katie lives in FL with her husband Jerrold, who is also in the wedding party.
Erin "Flynn" Voelz
Bridesmaid
Not sure her first name's spelled correctly since we've only ever called her Flynn...but Flynn Rider has been Ali's ride or die through every challenging college course in the supply chain program at UW. Flynn is the only person you want on your side for a team project, she has impeccable handwriting and will always sit on a living room floor with you drinking a Costco-sized wine bottle of yellowtail after a hard day. Flynn can take credit for introducing Ali to country music when her dear car Carl passed away. Flynn is one of few people equally obsessed with Whose Line Is It Anyway as Ali is, and is the reason a portion of Ali's liver is burned away due to a copious amount of fireball consumed throughout their friendship.
Ali Pine AKA "little Al"
Bridesmaid
Ali and Ali met on the rink in highschool. Ali B was notorious for beating Ali M up in front of the net...little did they know a couple years later they'd be random roommates at UW. Their harrowing first six months of living together involved Ali M getting robbed in their room and Witte dorm getting evacuated from Totinos pizza rolls that exploded in their microwave truly forged their friendship to unparalleled depths. Roomies for all 4 years of school; Ali was known as a prankster, always down to have a good time and the best college wingman + 5th quarter dance partner around.
Bowie Bergmann
Ring Bearer
Bowie is Joe and Ali's nephew who loves to crawl everywhere non-stop, is sweet as pie and you'll always find him sucking on his fingers ❤️
Marlow Bergmann
Flower Girl
Marlow is Joe and Ali's niece...except Joe is Marlow's favorite. Feel free to chat her up about Paw Patrol and Trash Truck or offer to sing a rendition of 'happy birthday' or 'twinkle, twinkle, little star' with her and she'll love you immediately.