Hope was an anxious and ancient soul with the freest movement and most beautiful drawings of flowers that could ever be. She was the spice.* Jacob was like the soul of our class in college, different and alive, parceling out warmth in cold spaces and standing up for what was good and right and beautiful. He was the spaghetti.* It was junior year of college when Hope first thought that Jacob had the most beautiful singing voice in all of church. Around that time, the two of us had begun to choreograph and improv together more often. Then one of our professors paired us together for a performance and said we had chemistry (That picture's on the bottom). After much internal turmoil during the quarantine, Hope eventually asked Jacob through text if he'd be interested in dating. She opened up her heart to him in such a brave and vulnerable way, and how did Jacob respond? He waited almost two whole days**, and then said sure, he'd try it for a while. This was not his best move. For our entire first few months of dating, we were awkward and silly, almost hiding from one another. But slowly and surely we grew closer, sharing stories, experiences and feelings. Jacob realized that this relationship was much more important to him than something he just wanted to try. It was out of more than convenience that we moved to Connecticut together to work for the same dance company. But moving there was hectic. We soon had to face a lot of disagreements and have a lot of hard but important discussions. So we got together with the pastor of the church we started going to, and for a good part of the next year, we learned and debated and figured about whether the relationship would work. We both had to make some hard choices, but it all boiled down to these questions: Who do you love more, yourself or your partner? Your partner or God? When Jacob knew the answer, he knew it was time to propose. * This is a reference to one of our first Sundays at Faith Christian Assembly. A random person tapped us on the shoulder during worship and without having spoken to us, barely having seen us, perfectly described the dynamic of our relationship at the time. We learned that this stranger was the pastor’s dad and he had just prophesied over us, meaning those words came direct from God. He said Jacob was the Spaghetti (comfort food) and Hope was the Spice (challenge) ** More accurately, he responded in a few hours. To which Hope responded quickly thereafter. To which Jacob responded in about two weeks. His initial response was more wordy and a little more considerate, but this description better matches our current feelings about that time period.

Thanksgiving 2022, Jacob woke up early and went downstairs to find Tom Blackburn and ask for his daughter’s hand. It was a very touching conversation, and that’s all that will be said about it. This was not the day he proposed, Jacob just wanted to get this done ahead of the game. In fact he hadn’t even bought the ring. Over Christmas break he began to look for one in earnest. When Jacob got home to Ohio after the winter shows were over, he told his parents it was time to look for a ring. They gave him a diamond from his grandfather, and took him to a jeweler where he picked out the ring Hope would like best. It was a white gold band with some delicate scrollwork. But there was one problem. The mounting of the diamond would take at least two weeks, and Jacob would be in Connecticut by then. Not wanting to risk sending it by mail, he and his family devised a plan. Julie’s birthday coming up in February, the perfect time for a trip to New York to watch a broadway show, see the Statue of Liberty, and pass a ring off to one of your sons to watch his proposal. The two of us got off work on a particularly busy weekend and took a train to the family’s AirBnb. We missed the broadway show, but we had enough time to stand in the very long line for Ellis Island. On the island, with the lady liberty looming over us, Jacob drew us away from our family and Hope began to get incredibly anxious. She was worried we would lose them. So reluctantly, we returned to an expectant pair of siblings. A little while later we said goodbye to the family, and Jacob led us to a church. It was Judson church, which was an important landmark for dance history and the website said there were no events that weekend. When we got there, there was a ticketed magic show. Jacob seemed visibly distressed and frustrated so Hope said to him, “Are you trying to propose to me?” Hope had seen through the guise like a window. In fact, she knew when Jacob had talked to her dad. She specifically wanted to know. And she wanted to know what timeframe the proposal would be in. And she wanted to start premarital counseling before the proposal. And she even sent him ring ideas. But Jacob picked it out on his own. Hope is averse to surprises. After a short, comforting conversation, we headed back to Connecticut and crossed the bridge from Middletown to Portland to go to our favorite park. It was dark and distinctly chilly, and there was a nice amphitheater nearby. We put on a song, “Archie, Marry Me,” and Jacob got on his knee. The words he said then are for their ears only.