Hetali and Vincenzo are marrying today in accordance with the ancient Vedic Wedding customs whose origins date somewhere from 3000-5000 B.C. Hindu marriage, or Vivaha, is a spiritual union of two individuals performed in the presence of God. The marriage ceremony is the thirteenth among the sixteen Samskaras, or rites of passage, that a Hindu observes during his or her lifetime. Today’s ceremony takes place in a traditional Mandap, or wedding altar. The four pillars symbolize the couple’s parents, who are pillars of strength and guidance, and the important role each parent has played in raising Hetali and Vincenzo. The flowers signify beauty and joy; the grains represent the food necessary to sustain life; the chori or urns in the four corners represent the Earth and its four directions. The wedding ceremony will be conducted in Sanskrit around a fire. The fire represents Agni, the Lord of Fire, and is the divine witness of the marriage bringing warmth throughout the couple’s life. The Vedic ceremony is a collection of symbolic rituals performed by the bride, groom, their parents, and close relatives. Each ritual has a deep spiritual and philosophical meaning and purpose.
Suswagatam is the welcoming of the Groom. Vincenzo arrives at the wedding accompanied by his family and friends in a lively procession called the Baraat. Hema, Hetali’s mother, welcomes Vincenzo with an auspicious red turmeric mark on the forehead called a “Tilak” and receives Vincenzo with a welcoming ritual, Aarti.Vincenzo then steps forward onto an earthen pot, crushing it into many pieces. This demonstrates that Vincenzo has the power to overcome all obstacles the couple may face in their normal life. Vincenzo is then escorted to the Mandap by Hetali’s parents.
Ganesh Puja is prayers for the Lord Ganesh. The ceremony commences with an invitation to Lord Ganesh, God of good fortune and prosperity, requesting him to remove any obstacles that may arise during marriage. A special prayer is said for Hetali and Vincenzo to ask for a righteous and truthful life as well as guidance in following family traditions and virtues.
Madhuparaka is the Honoring of the Groom. Vincenzo’s feet are washed and he is offered Madhuparaka, which is a sweet drink made of honey, clarified butter, and yogurt. The drink shall provide good health, strength, and brilliance, all of which are elements of a happy union. This ceremony symbolizes sweetening of the relationship between Hetali and Vincenzo’s families.
Mangalastak is a request of Blessings during which a sacred eight-verse poem is recited to seek God’s grace and the blessings of Hetali and Vincenzo’s ancestors in the forthcoming marriage.
Kanya Aagaman is arrival of the Bride. The priest recites sacred prayers invoking the divine spirits for their blessings, protection and permission to perform the ceremony. An Antarpat, or curtain, is held in front of Vincenzo to prevent the couple from seeing each other before marriage. When the curtain is lowered, Hetali will be the first sight Vincenzo sees. Hetali is escorted to the Mandap by her maternal uncles (mamas).
Kanya Daan is the giving away of the Bride. Hetali’s parents request Vincenzo to accept their daughter as his wife and ask him to promise that he treats her as an equal partner in all walks of life. Bharat and Hema give their daughter to Vincenzo through the symbolic act of passing holy water from the parents’ hands through Hetali’s hands and to Vincenzo’s hands. The giving away of a daughter is considered to be one of the holiest and greatest honors for parents.
This ritual centers on the joining of the couple’s hands. Hetali’s right hand is placed on Vincenzo’s right hand. The joining of the hands signifies that the couple is united and will live as though they are one body, mind, and soul. The couple’s hands are then tied together with a scarf wound several times while the priest recites holy verses. Although one knot may be broken, when it is wound several times, the fabric creates an unbreakable bond between the new couple. One end of Vincenzo’s sash and one corner of Hetali’s sari are tied together to symbolize their union. It is literally a tying of the knot where betel nuts, coins, rice, and flowers are placed within the knot that binds the couple. These items signify fertility, prosperity, longevity, and happiness. Vincenzo’s cousins then put a hand-woven cotton cord around the couple’s necks uniting them and protecting them from evil.
One of the most important parts of the wedding ceremony is when Hetali and Vincenzo circle the fire four times to affirm their marriage. With God as their witness, Hetali and Vincenzo promise to become one and that they will love and remain devoted to each other for the rest of their lives. A blessing from Hetali’s cousin precedes each round as he places rice in her hands. Hetali and Vincenzo then offer the rice to the sacred fire. With each round, the couple symbolizes the unity and their religious aspirations: Dharma - Religion and Moral Duty Artha - Prosperity Kama - Personal Happiness Moksha - Salvation
The Saptapadi, or seven sacred steps, set the holy seal on the eternal marriage, uniting the souls of the couple into one harmonious whole. Further, it reminds the pair of their individual and combined responsibilities towards their families, society, and each other. Seven little heaps of rice are placed one after another in a line close to the holy fire. Each heap represents a step and an accompanying vow. The couple then takes seven steps forward together, denoting the beginning of their life-long journey while the priest chants holy scriptures. With each step, a particular facet of married life is jointly promised and after each step the couple dismantles one mound with their feet. During the steps, Hetali and Vincenzo make one of the following vows: 1. Together we will nourish our bodies and hearts to accomplish all goals. 2. Together we will work towards our dreams, share our responsibilities and walk through life’s obstacles. 3. Together we will preserve mutual trust and prosperity to provide for our family’s needs. 4. Together we will cherish each other in sickness and in health; in happiness and in sorrow. 5. Together we will support our families in all endeavors. 6. We will speak and listen to one another with patience, honor one another’s values and seek truth through words, thoughts and actions. 7. Together we will remain lifelong companions and friends. Once the seven vows are taken, Hetali and Vincenzo are officially pronounced as husband and wife.
Sindoor-daan is the adornment of the Bride. Vincenzo now takes a pinch of sindoor (red powder) and places it in the parting of Hetali’s hair thereby promising to cherish and protect her as if she were his own life. He also offers her the Mangal Sutra, an auspicious necklace, which symbolizes the couple’s love and their sacred union. Both Vincenzo and Hetali then conclude these rituals by exchanging garlands which symbolize the union of two bodies and two souls into one entity.
Married women from Hetali's family will offer Hetali blessings of good luck, prosperity, and a long happy life.
The priest prays for blessings for the well being of Hetali and Vincenzo and of those assembled. Hetali and Vincenzo then touch the feet of their parents, grandparents, and elders in both families, simultaneously demonstrating their respect for them and receiving their blessings.
This portion which takes place This is a touching and emotional farewell ceremony between Hetali and her family. From this moment onward, she joins Vincenzo’s family and begins an important new role as his wife.