The Bakers

We met in Manhattan Beach for a coffee walk the weekend before Thanksgiving. Ben was wearing a thrifted bowling shirt, jeans and Jordans. I was wearing my roommate's jeans and a cropped blouse. As we walked off the early date jitters, the first conversation I remember having was about Ben's interest in grilling. I quipped that men our age all seemed to get into cooking, grilling or making artisanal coffee. We walked in the sun for a couple miles down to a bench close to the pier. Ben sat facing the Pacific and me, and I sat across from him on the curb, facing him. This was the first moment I got a real look at him from a calm place, and I remember thinking, "gosh, he's cute. Sorta Chris Pratt vibes? I can get behind this." As the sun set behind me, we talked about our jobs, our college experiences, our churches, and our ever-deepening wonder for God. What began as a casual coffee date turned into something much richer: an edifying conversation between two people enamored with Jesus, both eager for a deep place to listen and share. One of the most unusual and striking things Ben shared with me that day was that he'd recently been told by a near stranger that his "power was in his peace." I didn't understand the depth of that remark that day, but I sensed its truth. I knew that I was sitting across from someone centered, confident, calm, and considered with his words. Two years later, I can confirm that the stranger was right. Ben is the most centering, safe, calming person in my life. When it was time to head out, Ben asked me if he could listen to my church's sermon so he would have a reason to call me while we were home for the holiday. It was precious and reassuring. Walking away, I was pretty sure it went well, but I didn't leave with the usual swagger of a first date where you know you crushed it. I figured there was a possibility it felt like group therapy, and that upon reflection, Ben may decide that intensity wasn't quite his speed. Luckily, that wasn't the case. We had our first call the Friday after Thanksgiving, along with dozens of voice memos back and forth as I drove back down the 5 to LA. When we got back, I came home to the fiercest, simplest, and purest pursuit. After our third date, I met girlfriends for dinner and sang Ben's praises for the first time with the giddiness of a girl falling in love. A few short weeks later, we were best friends beginning to dream about the wedding you'll be attending this Summer.

Anyone who has met Emma knows her infectious zeal for connection. You know what I’m talking about – deep connection, not the ‘what’s your favorite color’ kind, the kind that will have you spilling your guts on the latest work drama or how you’re REALLY doing. Asking the right questions is one of her superpowers. That’s exactly what happened on our first date, a coffee walk in Manhattan Beach. I’d be lying to you if I told you the richness and depth of our conversation, mostly about our shared love of God, didn’t catch me by surprise – especially after the levity of her final text before the date. “Hi I’m dressed like this!” A selfie paired with a big grin and a thumbs up. Totally cute. (see for yourself in the gallery of our site) I traveled home to Wisconsin for Thanksgiving, where I told my best friend, Sam Gauger, that she was the woman I would marry. It wasn’t locker room talk or a sureness in my ‘game.’ Spirit-led decisions have a way of feeling easy. I spent the next several weeks prayerfully preparing to lead a Christ-centered relationship. This also included strategically finding reasons to set up phone calls (like watching sermons from her church), learning the art of the voice memo (if you know, you know), and showing off my skills on the grill with a fajita feast after a walk to the local Farmer’s Market. We started our relationship at the Passion 2022 conference in Atlanta, singing our hearts out in worship with our dear friend, Niya Esperanza. The perfect symbolic start to focus our year and our relationship on God. It was less than 24 hours before we had our first test: a fierce battle with a 6AM flight from the ATL airport. Emma seemed completely unbothered by the 100+ person line ahead of us just 15 minutes before boarding began, despite her lack of TSA Pre-Check. We sprinted through what felt like the entire airport, only to sit on the runway for two hours before finally taking off… “If God trusts me with His daughter Emma, He loves me more deeply than I can comprehend.” I journaled this after our fifth date. Two years later, I’m still learning this every single day. I sent the first long text (modern day love letter) after our third date. Part of it said this: “You are beautiful. You are funny. You are supportive and kind. You are wise. You are charismatic. You are confident. You are trustworthy. But I really just love that you are Emma.” I will always love that she’s Emma, and it’s the sweetest joy that she will be my bride.