Who Gives Speeches at Weddings?

Here’s a breakdown of who typically gives speeches at weddings and when. Use our guide to help you figure out what works best for you and yours!

By Jennifer Prince

Last updated April 23, 2024

Bride giving a speech at her wedding
Photo by Mario Schafer

Weddings are emotional roller coasters. Besides the vows, few moments carry as much emotional weight as the speeches. As the clamor of reception chatter halts, the clinking of knives on glasses invites the honored toasts. It’s an opportunity for couples to give the floor to those they love and care about to welcome guests, tell stories, and possibly even have everyone shed a tear or two. But who gives speeches at weddings, anyway?

For those about to tie the knot, the question is not only about who speaks but also about how to manage that highly anticipated mic time. In the vast symphony of wedding logistics, speeches stand out as an unscripted time that can either be fun and intimate or total chaos, depending on who has the floor.

This comprehensive guide is tailored to couples looking to enhance their receptions and bring a bit of personality into their receptions. From parents and siblings to friends and officiants, here’s who speaks at a wedding reception.

Typical timeline and breakdown of wedding speeches

The question of who gives speeches at weddings is best answered by coupling the traditional order of wedding reception speeches with who should offer them. So, the order of speeches at the reception below gives great insight into the who and how of these times at the mic.

The welcome toast

Who gives the welcome speech at a wedding? This honor is usually reserved for the parents of the couple. The purpose of the welcome toast is to make the guests feel welcome. It also centers everyone’s minds on the reception and evokes emotions from sentimental memories.

Reflecting on the union, the parents conceptualize the toast as a welcoming bridge of life's chapters. Be it the father's wisdom, the mother's warmth, or both parents sharing the limelight, this speech introduces the evening, setting a tone that resonates through the night.

The blessing

A customary part of the wedding structure, the blessing can be religious or secular. Close family members, the officiant, or influential community figures often offer it. Additionally, the blessing is a solemn invocation of joy and future success over the union. It transcends the marriage into spiritual realms, humbling the gathering before nature, love, and divine grace.

The best man and maid of honor toasts

If you’ve been wondering who gives a speech at a wedding, don’t skip out on those standing by your side. After all, these speeches, often the most anticipated and, subsequently, the most terrifying, are the products of unabated friendship and cherished memories.

The best man and maid of honor carry the torch of humor, sentimentality, and a dash of mischievousness. They speak of golden-oldie escapades, enduring friendship, and the unyielding support that bonds the trio of friends in the silent contract of trust and secrets.

wedding-reception-timeline-hero

The newlyweds' toast

This heartfelt moment the newlyweds share encapsulates the essence of love, commitment, and partnership. While not as common in all cultures, this modern practice allows the duo to express gratitude. They can also recognize the start of their joined life and, perhaps, sneak in a few playful comments. Doing such a speech can give the audience a glimpse into the dynamics of their relationship. A toast for the bride and groom is common, but a toast from them makes the evening even more special.

Who gives a speech at the wedding rehearsal dinner?

The rehearsal dinner, a pre-wedding soirée, often includes its own set of speeches and toasts. Who gives the wedding toast at the rehearsal is often up for debate. Sometimes, it’s even up to the mother of the groom.

Parents

It’s common for the parents or significant guardians of the bride and groom to give speeches at the rehearsal dinner. These are appreciated as more casual expressions of love and support, free from the structured formality of the wedding day protocols.

The couple-to-be

In modern times, it's also not uncommon for the couple to say a few words of thanks and anticipation. This can be a touching moment for the couple to share their excitement and appreciation in a less formal setting. They can also give a bridal party toast to thank their attendants.

Who should I ask to give a speech at my wedding?

Selecting the right individuals to speak at your wedding is a decision of great honor. While wedding planning, it’s important to think about who gives the speeches at a wedding reception.

Even if you’ve already figured out how many speeches at a wedding you’ll have, choosing the right mix of presenters is key. Plus, there are a few things to consider when weighing your options.

Understand the culture.

Wedding traditions are often deeply rooted in cultural practices. Understanding the specific expectations of who gives the speeches at weddings can save you from a diplomatic misstep. In some cultures, the godparents might have a speaking role, while in others, the best man’s speech might be a highlight. Acknowledge and accommodate these cultural nuances when selecting your speakers.

Give weight to personal considerations.

Bridal couples must feel a profound connection with the individuals chosen to speak. Discussing the expectations and the content of the speeches can ensure that the personal tales shared are in good taste and align with the couple’s narrative.

Know who will be reliable.

A wedding speech is not the time for surprises. Ensure those who speak are familiar with public speaking. They should also have a friendly, reliable, and potentially sober disposition (at least until after the speeches!).

Think about the emotional ties.

The speakers should have a meaningful connection to the couple or family. It's not about status or impressive titles; it’s about shared history and a genuine desire to honor the occasion with a heartfelt address.

Wedding Toast by Photos by Lanty on Unsplash

Consider the personality and style of the individual.

The most memorable speeches are those that resonate authentically with the personality of the speaker. Whether it’s a quiet grace or an exuberant spirit, the speeches should be a natural extension of the speaker's persona.

Ensure the person is willing to prepare a speech.

The adage, ‘fail to prepare, prepare to fail,’ holds true for wedding speeches. The selected speakers should be willing to invest time and effort into crafting their message.

Wedding toast hints for speechgivers

If the answer to “who gives speeches at weddings” is you, then here’s a short guide to pulling it off successfully. A worthy wedding toast combines humor, sentiment, and brevity into a cohesive, engaging message.

It’s a balancing act that not everyone can pull off, but with a bit of guidance, anyone can deliver a memorable toast. Who gives a wedding toast on your big day is important to them, you, and your guests.

Dos and don’ts of wedding speeches

  • Do keep it short.
  • Don't overshadow the other speakers.
  • Do share personal stories.
  • Don't dredge up old and potentially embarrassing tales.
  • Do practice.
  • Don't memorize word for word.

Structure of wedding speeches

A good speech usually follows the simple structure of an introduction, body, and conclusion. A toast, however, is less rigid in form. Keep it light and memorable, and always end with a direct “to the happy couple.”

Wedding Toast by Al Elmes on Unsplash

FAQ about wedding speeches

Who gives speeches at weddings vs. rehearsal dinners?

Rehearsal dinner speeches tend to be given by close friends and family, often setting a more intimate and relaxed tone. In contrast, wedding speeches are a blend of formal and personal accolades, typically delivered by the bridal party, parents, and sometimes, the couple themselves.

Do people give speeches during the wedding ceremony?

Speeches during the actual wedding ceremony are less common but not unheard of. In religious services, clergy often deliver homilies that resemble speeches in their reflective and narrative style, sometimes allowing for personalized content.

Do the bride and groom give speeches?

As stated above, sometimes the newlyweds give some of the best speeches at weddings. However, if you want to add a creative twist, think about having a bride toast to the groom (or bride) or the groom to his partner. Giving a toast to the groom or bride from the newly crowned spouse can be a treasured moment.

Who will endorse your beginning?

Selecting who gives speeches at your wedding is an act of trust and tribute. Each speech, however, should not only resonate with the couple but also with the essence of the celebration.

Secure in the knowledge of who, when, and how these voices speak, you and your partner can rest assured that the echoes of the speeches will reverberate through the story of their marriage. If you’re wondering exactly how long your reception should be so that you can make time for speeches, check out Zola’s wedding reception timeline.

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